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Increasingly, I just don’t get advertising. Not in a “I’m not cool enough” way. Some campaigns just leave me completely baffled. Examples:<br /><br />On the side of London buses are ads with phrases such as: “Wake up and smell the broccoli. Coffee – irreplaceable.” Ok, I like coffee. Who doesn’t? Not many people, if the number of Starbucks is any guide. But why advertise a substance? Who does this benefit? Can we expect more ads like “When you leave the house, wear shoes.”? At least advertise a sodding brand. <br /><br />Another ad (this time in the tube) which leaves me puzzled is a picture of a shark with the caption “Have you seen him? I’m hungry.” Who is “him”? Who is hungry? I have eaten shark. Sharks have eaten people. Who is eating who here? Can sharks talk? What the HELL is this an advert for? The shark looks half-dead anyway. If this is advertising the aquarium, it’s a very poor effort.<br /><br />And what is up with the rugby players promoting the Zurich Premiership? This features Will Greenwood stiching up Lawrence Dallaglio by making him back his car into a row of hell’s angels bikes, then ordering a pint. So far, so good. But at the end of the ad, outside the pub window, we see Dallaglio in some messiah-like weird pinch-hold with the bikers. Surely they would just have a fight. It looks so wrong, I have no idea where to begin. <br />